God alone

'For God alone my soul waits in silence,

from Him comes my salvation.

He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress;

I shall not be greatly shaken.

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,

for my hope is from Him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

my fortress; I shall not be shaken. 

On God rests my glory;

my mighty rock, my refuge is God.'

~King David

Psalm 62:1,2, 5-7

For God alone my soul waits.....

Those are lofty words. 

Don't get me wrong, I long for God but I find that often my heart sings the tune of, 

"I long for God and _____________________" 

To be able to stand and resolutely say, "For God alone my soul waits" is a soul that is no longer of human origin, but has tasted and experienced the presence of the Almighty and as a result all of life is confined within that delight. 

The soul that sings "For God alone..." takes joy in the all sufficiency of God and says that He is all I need and all I want. 

The understanding of human kind, 

the companionship of others, 

the gracious acceptance of my fellow man....

they are all nice and great and good,

but if they will come at a compromise of the lordship of God in my life, I will pass thank you. 

Because my soul's greatest delight is in the Person and Presence of the Almighty God. 

It is when and only when I live my life with this desire that I am free to love the way God loves. When my soul's greatest satisfaction is in the righteousness of God, the need to be understood, served, loved, respected, accepted, promoted...falls away because I understand that I have all that and more within the shadow of His wings. He will uphold my cause for He judges righteously. 

As I love God wholly and stand in right relationship with Him, 

my marriage will be blessed.

my children will be blessed. 

As my soul cries out, "My hope is in You O Lord!" I am putting God in His proper place and human kind and human circumstances in theirs. My hope does not come from health--of body or relationships--my hope does not come in financial prosperity or academic endeavor, for all of those things are of temporary nature. 

When this understanding begins to take root in the inner recesses of my soul,

I will be freed from the need to be known and understood and recognized

because as I savor God, I will profoundly understand that I am known and understood by God.

and that is enough. 

what I need

During the course of any waking moment, there is a myriad of things that I find myself saying, either to myself in the quietness of my soul, under my breath is frustration or out loud to another human being.
These are things that I believe are true, and at the end of the day there may be some truth in them, but I as I sit in the stillness of my Creator's presence, I hear the words of my mouth and I stand corrected.

I need to get away.  I need to get more organized. I need to get up earlier. I need to go to bed earlier. I need to exercise more. I need to eat less. I need to read more. I need to lose five pounds. I need to get away. 

The list goes on.
You are no different.
I know this because as humans, as women, as mothers and wives and friends and mentors, we give of ourselves from the time our senses become aroused from sleep and the wheels of our minds start to turn in thought and consideration of the day that stretches out before us.
We are giving. We are doing. We are striving. We are planning. We are executing the plan.
The effective and proper execution of that plan depends wholly upon the resources we have...this is where the "I need..." comes into play.

While the needs we have in any given moment are valid and some may be healthy, the breakdown and the hangup often occur when we fail to see our primary need: God.

King David, a man who maintained order in a kingdom, wrestled with sin nature, and longed for God's heart to beat in his own chest, undoubtedly understood the weight of productivity, organization, accomplishment and all the other things that we ourselves carry through our days. As a result, when he writes, I listen--or should I say, what God has penned through his human fingers, I take to heart...

'Oh God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;

my soul thirsts for you;

my flesh faints for you,

as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

So I have looked upon you in your sanctuary, beholding your power and glory.

Because your love is better than life, 

my lips will praise you.

So I will bless you as long as I live;

in your name I will lift up my hands.'

Psalm 63:1-4

I need to cry out to God. I need to acknowledge God as who He is to me. I need to seek God, for without Him I am parched and weak. I need to gaze upon the face of God. I need to behold His power and His glory. I need His love for it is better than any attempt of love on my own behalf. I need to praise Him for who He is, and who He continues to be in spite of myself. I need to bless God. I need to lift up my hands in personal and corporate worship. I need God. 

When these words become true of me, all the other needs that I have will fall into their proper places, for the essence of all that I need begins and ends with God...with a fixed gaze upon the all consuming face of God, the beautiful and fulfilling Person of God. 

A.W. Tozer, a brilliant writer and man of God, wrote these words: 

'Indeed, Jesus taught that He wrought
His works always by keeping 

His inward eyes upon His Father.
His power lay in His continuous 

look at God (John 5:19-21). In full
accord with the few texts we have 

quoted is the whole tenor of the inspired
Word. It is summed up for us in the
Hebrew epistle when we are instructed
to run life's race "looking unto Jesus, 
the Author and Finisher of our faith" (Heb 12:2) 

From all this we learn that faith is not 
a once-done act, but a continuous 

gaze of the heart at the Triune God. 
Like the eye, which sees everything 

in front of it and never sees itself, faith
is occupied with with the Object 

upon which it rests and pays no attention
to itself at all. While we are looking 

at God, we do not see ourselves--blessed riddance. 
The man who has struggled to purify 
himself and has had nothing but repeated 
failures will experience real relief when 
he stops tinkering with his soul and looks 

away to the perfect One. While he looks 
at Christ, the very things he has 

so long been trying to do will be 
getting done within him. It will be God 

working in him to will and to do. ' (
The Pursuit of God p.90, 91)

Sweet Jesus,

Remind me of my Savior's words in John 15--

"Abide in Me and I in you....for apart from me, you can do nothing." 

Tune my heart to sing your praise today. Remind my ever wandering heart of my desperate need for you. As I live these blessed moments that you have given me today, I pray that my heart would desperately seek you, as in a dry and weary land. I pray that more than anything else, I would long for your presence and the beauty of your fellowship as I abide in You and You abide in me. 

Remind me that although I may set about to do great things, 

apart from you, I can do nothing--nothing of value anyway. For it is You, at work within me, that any good comes. 

Let your goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee. 

Turn my eyes away from myself that I may gaze upon you

and in that gaze, let me see myself for who I am and more importantly, may I see You for who You are and a result, may I truly understand what it means to live and love. 

By the blood of the Perfect Lamb, I pray, Amen. 

<><tce

a sober celebration

'And on the first day of Unleavened Bread, when they sacrificed the Passover lamb, 

his disciples said to him,

"Where will you have us go and prepare for you to eat the Passover?"

And he sent two of his disciples and said to them, 

"Go into the city, and a man carrying a jar of water will meet you. 

Follow him, and wherever he enters, say to the master of the house,

'The Teacher says, Where is my guest room, where I may eat the Passover with my disciples?'

And he will show you a large upper room furnished and ready;

there prepare for us."

And the disciples set out and went to the city and found it just as he had told them, and they prepared the Passover. 

And when it was evening, he came with the twelve. And as they were reclining at the table and eating, Jesus said,

"Truly I say to you, one of you will betray me, one who is eating with me."

...

And as they were eating, he took bread, and after blessing it broke it and gave it to them, and said, 

"Take; this is my body."

and he took a cup, and when he had given thanks he gave it to them, and they all drank of it.

And he said to them, 

"This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many..."

Mark 14:12-18, 22-24

Imagine......

Thirty three years of wandering this dusty planet as a misunderstood, accused and disliked man, 

God--the Creator of the Universe, the Defender of the weak, the King of kings, Lord of all lords, the Giver of all good things--confined to a human body, the Creator becomming created...

was all coming together. 

The grand finale was about to begin. 

The groaning of creation longing for redemption was about to be answered. 

Christ was about to be delivered. 

betrayed.

beaten. 

mocked.

denied. 

stripped.

humiliated. 

crucified. 

The final players were being put into place as a God's beautiful plan of redemption began to unfold.

Humanity stood oblivious. 

Families made plans for their own celebrations. 

The food prepared. 

The tables set. 

People unaware of the Messiah for which they had long dreamed of was not only among them, but preparing to redeem them. 

A common man. An unlikely group of common men, with little in common except for their Teacher. 

A common celebration. 

An eternity changing, life redeeming, sin forgiving celebration was about to begin in this small upper room and culmiate near a common tomb. 

Sitting among the common was the Divine. 

Sitting and reclining with sinners was the Spotless Lamb of God. 

Those in need of redemption, dining with the Redeemer. 

unaware. 

It didn't start in this room. It didn't start in a stable, thirty three years prior. 

It started before the formation of the world. 

God set out to glorify Himself through the redemption of His fallen creation

through the blood of His Son. 

As they gathered around the table to celebrate Passover, 

undoubtedly Christ was overwhelmed with emotion...

knowing what lay ahead of him and knowing what lie behind, 

He humbled Himself, 

took the form of a servant and became obedient--

even to death. 

He took the bread, broke it as a symbol of his soon to be broken body on their behalf and shared it with the oblivious and undeserving sinners sitting around Him. 

He took the wine, poured it out and passed it around...

"This is my blood poured out for many..." 

Poured out for those that will choose to accept it 

and poured out for those that would choose to deny it. 

Poured out for the undeserving, the slefish, the lustful, the needy, the arrogant, the shamed, the fearful, the angry, the broken.....

poured out for you. 

poured out for me. 

There isn't a single life on earth that is not in need of this blood of the covenant. 

Tonight, as you dine, let the somber truth of tonight wash over you. 

Let Christ meet you where you are. 

Turn your eyes upon heaven, and gaze into His wonderful face. 

Allow the things of earth to fade away.

Take the bread and remember that His body was broken for you.

Drink of the cup, and allow the all sufficient sacrificial blood of Christ cover it all. 

All of your strivings. All of your fear. All of your shame. All of your achievements. All of your regret. All of your hopes. All of your dreams. All of the broken dreams. 

Whether you are a in beautiful church of stained glass or whether you are wandering with no place call home, Christ's body and blood was shed for you.

What will be your response? 

"Take and eat; this is my body.

Drink of it, all of you, for this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins." 

~Jesus Christ

Matthew 26: 26b,27b,28a

<><tce

a glimpse

'Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, 

for the first heaven and first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more.

And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, 

prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. 

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 

"Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. 

He will dwell with them and they will be his people,

and God Himself will be with them as their God.

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more,

neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore, 

for the former things have passed away.

And he who was seated on the throne said,

"Behold, I make all things new."

And He also said, 

"Write this down for these words are trustworthy and true."

And He said to me, 

"I am the Alpha and the Omega,

the beginning and the end. 

To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment.

The one who conquers will have this heritage,

and I will be his God and he will be my son.

But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable,

as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all the liars, 

their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur,

which is the second death."

The wall was built of jasper, while the city was pure gold, clear as glass.

The foundations of the wall of the city were adorned with every kind of jewel. 

The first was jasper, the second sapphire, the third agate, 

the fourth emerald, the fifth onyx, the sixth carnelian, the seventh chrysolite, 

the eight beryl, the ninth topaz, the tenth chrysophase, 

the eleventh jacinth and the twelfth amethyst. 

And the twelve gates were twelve pearls, each of the gates made of a single pearl, 

and the street of the city was pure gold, transparent as glass.

And I saw no temple in the city, for its temple is the Lord God Almighty and the Lamb. 

And the city has no need of sun or moon to shine upon it, 

for the glory of God gives it light and its lamp is the Lamb.

Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, bright as crystal, 

flowing from the throne of God and of the Lamb through the middle of the street of the city; 

also, on either side of the river, the tree of life with its twelve kinds of fruit,

 yielding its fruit each month. 

The leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. 

No longer will there be anything accursed, but the throne of God and of the Lamb will be in it, 

and his servants will worship him. 

They will see His face, and his name will be on their foreheads. 

And night will be no more. 

They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light, 

and they will reign forever and ever. '

Revelation 21:1-8, 18-23, 22:1-5

In my limited and sin-stricken human understanding, the perfect and unhindered presence of the Almighty God is something I can't even imagine. 

More than streets paved with gold, 

the gates of pearl, 

the fruit, 

the healing, 

the comfort, 

the presence of the saints....

So much more than all of that, 

I am eager for His presence. 

To be face to face with God--

the One who is everything and in everything--

the Author and Perfecter of my faith--

the True Vine--

the Light. 

I am eager to be in the presence of God. 

Today, while I live life in the dust of earth and the angst of human strivings, 

I will practice the presence of God. 

I will recognize that although I am sinful and I will fail, 

I will set my heart on things above and not on things of this earth. 

I will intentionally incline the eyes of my heart to seek Him, 

to hold Him, 

to love what He loves and 

to serve as He served. 

And then, when my strivings of life are through, 

may He open His mouth and welcome me into His glorious and radiant presence. 

<><tce

the order of which

I long to rejoice.

I yearn for refreshment. 

I deeply desire to dwell among the wise. 

I hunger for intelligence. and wisdom. 

I crave honor. 

The longer I live the more I realize how similar humanity is. At the end of the day, we all desire to be recognized. We desire to be understood and to understand. We long to be loved and to have the opportunity to love in return. When all is said and done, I long to love Jesus more than I did when my feet hit the cold floor when the day was new. 

'The light of the eyes rejoices the heart,

and good news refreshes the bones. 

The ear that listens to life giving reproof will dwell among the wise.

Whoever ignores instruction despises himself,

but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence. 

The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom, 

and humlity comes before honor.'

Proverbs 15:28, 30-33 

Humanity is seeking and chasing feverishly the blessing and abundance of God and yet it fails to come under His protective covering. John 15:10, Jesus says pointedly with complete love, "If you keep my commandments, you will abide in My love." This is not because Christ is a dictator. This is because there is safety and blessing within the loving boundaries and correction of our Creator. 

As I long for wisdom, it is critical that I listen to reproof...even when it exposes that which I wish desperately to hide. 

If I long to rejoice, I must dwell within light--The Light-- and fill my eyes with light. 

If I yearn for refreshment, I must saturate myself in the good news--the Good News. 

"Fear not, for behold I bring you good news of a great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Savior, who is Christ the Lord!" ~Multitude of Angels to unworthy, uneducated and deeply loved and divinely chosen Shepherds (Luke 2:10,11) 

The truth, life, death and resurrection of Christ is MY GOOD NEWS!

I want wisdom? Fear God--understand my place and His glory--embrace it, find beauty and strength in my inadequacy and His sufficiency. Embrace the surrender and the fear. 

I desire honor? 

Take a look upon the life of Jesus Christ, the very definition of humilty and honor. 

'Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not consider equatlity with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in the likeness of men, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on the cross. 

Therefore, God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above all names, so that at the name of Jesus Christ, every knee should bow and every tongue confess, that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." 

~Apostle Paul, Philippians 2:5-11

Can I get an AMEN?!

Editors side note: Can you imagine what that moment will be like? 

Every knee will bow and every tongue will confess! That includes all those that have spent their live's work trying to destroy Christianity, marriage as it is defined by God, killed babies mercilessly in the name of 'free choice', executed Christians, and profaned the cross of Christ. There will come a day when they will bow and they will confess that Christ is Lord--this does not mean they will be saved for at that time, it will be too late if they had not confessed during their time on earth--but they will stand face to face with the very God they spent their lives trying to deny--oh what a moment!!

The point is, we cannot have the blessing without the obedience. 

Obedience is hard. Doing the right thing is the hardest thing we could ever do. 

It will be the hardest thing to teach to our children and human nature promises to challenge it. 

However, it is within that obedience and that surrender and the brokeness that it brings, 

that we will find healing.

freedom.

refreshment.

wisdom. 

honor. 

But, to quote the words of Apostle Paul, 

Do not grow weary my friends in doing good, 

for in due time, you will reap a reward (Galatians 6).

We must obey in order to receive the blessing. 

I pray that obedience and blessing would be your companions on this sunny, spring day. 

humbled. 

tiffany 

a letter to learn from: genuine

"Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you--

I, Paul, and old man now and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus--

I appeal to you for my child Onesimus, whose father I became in my imprisonment.

...I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness

might might not be by compulsion

but of your own accord."

~Apostle Paul to Philemon

Philemon 8-10, 14

I love how relevant the Bible is. 

I am reminded daily that is alive and active, sharper than any double edged sword (Hebrews 4:12) and although they are ancient words of truth, because it is the Truth and it is alive and active, it will always be relevant to our lives at all times. 

This is no exception. 

As I read this letter from Paul to a brother in Christ, he is making a plea. 

He is pleading on behalf of a transformed brother in Christ. 

It is clear that although separated physically, Paul has the authority and strength of influence to ask something of Philemon and see results. He has the authority to 'command it be done' but he chooses something different--he chooses to appeal. 

This is not emotional manipulation, but rather a spiritual exhortation so as to impact Philemon's understanding of the situation as a whole that he may make the best decision according to God's perfect plan of brotherhood in the Body of Christ. 

Paul understands that coerced love is not genuine love. 

Love must not be the result of feelings or emotion because that is sure to change. 

Love must not be a result of coercion because that will end in resentment. 

Love must be a choice. 

If love is to be genuine, if love is to be sincere, if love is to be beneficial and fulfilling, 

love must be a choice. 

Join me today in making a choice. 

I pray that you too will have a desire to love those and accept those for who God is transforming them to be. I pray that my heart would see the new creation rather than the flawed human soul my heart is so inclined to see. I pray that we would see and celebrate the evidences of grace and that as a result, we would choose to love. Not out of coercion but out of obedience to Christ. Not out of manipulation but out of genuine love....

the way Christ has loved us. 

"Therefore, be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." 

(Ephesians 5:1,2)

"Let love be genuine...." 

(Romans 12:9a)

Forget not that you are loved. 

Forget not that you are forgiven. 

Forget not that God has a choice in both matters

as do you. 

May the love of God change you.

May you live forgiven. 

May you forgive that you may live. 

May you love genuinely. 

blessed. 

tiffany 

a funeral and a wedding

My heart has been savoring the words of King Solomon in the book of Proverbs.
The more I read, the more my heart longs for wisdom.
I long for discretion.
I long for discernment.
I long for understanding and self control.
I long for wisdom--to wear her like a dearly loved necklace--beautiful and protected and close to my heart.

Saturday was an interesting day. It was exhausting emotionally. It started with tears and ended with tears. The tears though, were two very different types of tears.

Saturday morning, dear friends of ours, said a final farewell to their beloved newborn son, who departed from earth to enter eternity after only twenty-five and one half weeks in existence.
He was perfect and beautiful.
The number of his days were altogether lovely and perfectly planned by His loving Creator.
Although there is great peace and rest in this truth, there is still great sadness for two parents who just want their baby back.
The anguish is great. The pain is real. There are no words to speak to the pain.
Just the still, small voice of Truth that says, "Come, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest." 
Although words cannot explain it and only the Spirit of God can begin to heal it,
there was an overwhelming sense of hope in the midst of this unspeakable loss.

Late that same afternoon, I had been asked to share at the wedding of a couple I used to disciple. They have been living together for many years and have three children together. There is a history of drug use and alcohol abuse. They have the head knowledge of Biblical truth, but fail to see its value in life or the beauty in the freedom that the instruction and fear of Lord provide.

As I drove to the wedding, I prayed that the Spirit of God would prevail over the spirit of darkness that had been vying for their souls. I prayed that I would have a heart of love and celebration as they take this step of marriage. I surrendered the feeling of pointlessness and hopelessness.

What happened within the next three hours is terribly difficult to articulate and the only response I had as I drove home, thankful it was over, was tears.
Tears for what the Lord has given and how it has been wasted.
I wept for the gifts of life and the heritage of children that are sacrificed on the altar of momentary pleasure and drunken foolishness.

'My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commands with you, 
making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding;
yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding,
if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,
then you will understand the fear of the Lord and will find the knowledge of God. 
For the Lord gives wisdom;
from His mouth come knowledge and understanding;
He stores up sound wisdom for the upright;
He is a shield for those who walk in integrity,
guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of the saints.
Then you will understand righteousness and justice and equity, every good path;
for wisdom will come into your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul;
discretion will watch over you,
understanding will guard you,
delivering you from the way of evil,
from men of perverted speech,
who forsake the paths of righteousness to walk in the ways of darkness,
who rejoice in doing evil and delight in the perverseness of evil,
men whose paths are crooked and who are devious in their ways.'
~King Solomon
Proverbs 2:1-15


I have spent countless hours with this couple as they wonder why God allows the hardships they face. I counsel them, pray with them, read Scripture with them. They want God's blessing, but have no desire to seek Him, to surround themselves with others that hunger for Righteousness, to receive His words, to call out for insight or to seek Him like precious jewels.
The result is hopelessness.
The result is that He will not shield them from the destruction of their own behavior.

As I drove home, I wept over the stark contrast of the two events of the day:
a hope filled, Christ centered funeral
and
a hopeless, Godless, wedding of fools.
While there may be laughing and feasting outwardly, if Christ is not present, all hope is gone.
In sharp contrast, even in the presence of deep grief and loss and tragedy, where the Spirit of the Lord is, the great is great hope, unexplainable peace, unconditional joy.
When all is said and done,
it is not life or happiness we long for and our souls crave--
it is the presence of the Almighty God.
So if that means standing in the house of mourning,
I will gladly forgo the wedding of fools,
to dwell in the Presence of God in the company of saints.

Oh sweet Jesus, Lover of my soul!
Let me not throw the beauty of the life you have given before the swine to be trampled underfoot for the sake of momentary pleasure. 
Today, I seek you. My heart longs for wisdom and so I will intentionally saturate my mind with Your Word and those who speak Your Word and live Your Word. 
Grant my heart grace to receive your words: to hear them and live them.
Incline my ear to wisdom as I raise my voice to heaven and cry out for understanding. 
You promise to shield those who walk in integrity
and so this new day my sweet Jesus, 
I pray that I will walk integrity, and train my children to follow hard after You. 
Thank you for the promise of Your presence, even in the midst of unspeakable pain. 
May I savor Your presence today and spread the fragrance of Christ everywhere I go. 
Amen


seeking.
tiffany